Archive for July, 2012

Falling with style!

July 31, 2012 Leave a comment

Yesterday evening brought new hope to all of us ‘Couch Olympians’ who have often dreamed of achieving sporting glory, but have always lacked the talent and commitment required.

Last night’s action in the Men’s Team Gymnastics final, saw the plucky British team cruelly robbed of a silver medal by a Japanese gymnast who managed to fall off the apparatus, with style! After initially being docked points for the fall, the Japanese team protested that the fall had been rather more stylish than initially judged and succeeded in restoring the half point needed to regain the silver medal and demote our guys back to bronze.

Falling with style to win an Olympic silver medal! Hell, I could do that!

As of this morning I have begun a rigorous training regime aimed at achieving glory at the 2016 Games in Brazil. My training will include throwing myself over the back of my sofa, with style and taking a header down a flight of stairs. As long as I mange to land on my feet, I should be OK.

I’m also looking for a prospective partner to train for the 10m synchronised belly-flop event, but I’ve had no luck, so far!

Categories: Olympics Tags: ,

Blame it on Twitter!

July 30, 2012 Leave a comment

Apparently Twitter cost Team GB a stick-on Olympic gold medal at the weekend!

Data-hungry crowds spoil Olympic TV coverage, archers alerted

If, like me, you sat down on Saturday afternoon to watch Mark Cavendish win the Men’s Cycling Road Race, only to be disappointed as our boy never even got a sniff of the leading riders, we can blame it all on technology (or rather the lack of it!)

Nothing to do with Box Hill, or negative Australian tactics, or being knackered after 3 weeks touring in France, it was all down to the amount of Twittering going on around the course!

Unlike in the Tour, Cavendish, Wiggins and Co. didn’t have radios to get information on where the other riders were and instead, had to rely on officials with blackboards riding pillion on motorbikes, to keep them informed!

But even they were struggling to know what was going on, due to a mobile data bottleneck from the rider’s GPS systems, as huge volumes of Tweets were swamping the data network. It’s a wonder therefore, that they managed to get to the finish at all!

Never mind Cav, there will always be next time. I’m sure the data networks in the Amazon Jungle will put deepest, darkest Dorking to shame! (You know they will!)

Categories: Olympics Tags: ,

An Easy Mistake!

July 26, 2012 Leave a comment

Who would have thought that the women’s football would have caused the first major excitement of the 2012 Olympics!


(I think that’s the right one!)

In a classic display of incompetence the 2012 Officials at Hampden Park, yesterday introduced the North Korean players under the South Korean flag! You really have to admire stupidity like that, we’ve truly raised it to an art form!

According to the Telegraph, the British Olympic Association chairman Colin Moynihan has tried to excuse the incident by saying that if Team GB had run out to a flag of another team he would have understood that it was down to human error and not any kind of malice.

Regardless of the rights or wrongs of North Korea, these two countries are technically still at war and I think Lord Moynihan is sort of missing the significance! Yes, if, in a far flung land, the GB team walked out to the American flag, the French national anthem, or God forbid, the Union Jack flown the wrong way up, we could laugh it off. But what if it was the Nazi Swastika, would we still see the funny side? I’m not so sure.

It’s the player’s I feel sorry for however, as they’ve clearly missed the perfect opportunity to claim political asylum with newfound citizenship of the South and avoid spending the rest of their lives in a labor camp, when they don’t win the latest Great Leader a medal!

Categories: Olympics Tags: ,

To Pay the Devil or not?

July 24, 2012 Leave a comment

Once again, I find that life can quickly condition us to expect more and more (or is it less and less?).

I found myself being grateful to BSkyB at the weekend for allowing us to watch the German Grand Prix, for free, without having to venture into the ‘Dark Side’ of the Internet to find a pirated feed that doesn’t get swamped, the instant the race starts!

Then I remembered that last year I was watching it for free anyway (or at least without the additional £350 per year for Sky Sports, on top of my licence fee) and so I quickly stopped being grateful again.

I’m sure the Murdoch Minion’s had a plan that giving us this teaser might tempt some of us to part with more of our cash, by showing all the wonderful stuff we could have for just £30 a month (on Virgin Media). The trouble is, in spite of the whole weekend being entirely free, the only thing I actually wanted to watch, was the race. The rest of their offering, outside of the football season, was entirely uninspiring! For me, it left me less inclined to subscribe, not more so!

To be fair, however, I do now have something of a dilemma! My instinct is to take any available option not to put more money into Murdoch’s pocket. But, I now have a 17 year old daughter, an avid F1 fan, who has just spent an entire weekend in front of the F1 channel, with it’s wall to wall repeats of Free Practice 1, 2 and 3, Qualifying, the Race itself, the F1 Show, an Interview with Jenson and all over and over again! She’s hooked, and I’m under pressure!

Categories: Stuff Tags: ,

Attempted Delivery

July 20, 2012 Leave a comment

One for a Friday afternoon.

I think Lee Evans’ ‘Attempted Delivery’ is a work of genius.

Attempted Delivery

Though seeing as this has now happened to me twice in the space of a few weeks, I’m beginning to think we must be living on the Moon, instead of Hampshire!

We have running water and electricity, we get our bins collected every week (or so), supermarket vans and guys on mopeds turn up with food. Even removal lorries mange to make it through this uncharted ‘Here be Dragons’ wasteland, somewhere west of Guildford!

So how is it that I have now lost two days of my life and spent about £15 in premium rate phone calls, so that a City Link driver can twice ‘attempt’ a delivery, only to encounter a low bridge about a mile from his destination, turn around and give up!

Have they never heard of sat-nav!

According to their web site slogan, “Next day. Same day. Every Way.”

How about, “Try the Other Way!”

Categories: Stuff Tags: ,

O2 Customers targeted by spammers

July 19, 2012 Leave a comment

It seems that those pesky spammers have been at it again! This time targeting the poor unfortunate O2 customers desperate to return to the connected world in the face of last week’s service outage.

Talk about kicking a man when he’s down!

The emails claim to come from ‘The o2 Team’ and invite victims to log on and protect their account with a security update!

As usual, of course, the spammer gives himself away with the deft use of Pidgin English in the second sentence, but for a few O2 customers, shaking with rage or withdrawal symptoms, the subtly may have gone unnoticed.

If, like me, you are lucky enough to receive one of these (copied below, with links removed), you had better watch out or your O2 account may give rise to a case of “O @#*%!”

[O2 Logo]

Dear customer,

We would like to apologise for the service disruption some of our customers have been experiencing. As part of on going upgrade to our services, we have introduced a better security update into network for better services.

Click the link below to protect your account with the new security update.


The o2 Team


O2 Customer Service
Please note that this email has been sent to you from an unmonitored email account so we will not be able to respond to any replies to it. If you need more help, please visit our online Help Centre at
Telefónica UK Limited, Registered Office 260 Bath Road, Slough, SL1 4DX.
Registered in England and Wales No. 1743099.


Categories: Mobiles Tags: ,

Symantec blamed for Windows crashes

July 17, 2012 Leave a comment

According to an article in ITPro yesterday, a recent update to Symantec’s Norton Anti-Virus has caused a considerable number of PCs running Windows XP to blue screen and become unusable.

Customers reported it took Symantec hours to identify and fix the bug and that the solution offered involved users having to manually remove the software from each disabled computer!

User’s variously described the process as “time consuming” to “Phoning Symantec support this morning was the start of the hell we went through!”

I can’t believe Symantec actually suggested trying to remove Norton AV! Have you ever tried to get rid of that stuff!? Such a thought fills me with dread! Still, anyone happy enough to use Norton on a regular basis, has probably had plenty of similar experience by now and knew exactly what to do, blindfolded!

Companies reported hundreds of PCs had been affected, so expect some fairly hefty compensation claims heading Symantec’s way pretty soon!

Categories: Software Tags: ,
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